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[personal profile] bestswordmaster
If you ever want to do a PSL or meme with me, just drop me a PM!

Date: 2021-06-15 01:08 am (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (✦ ᴛᴀʟᴋ)
From: [personal profile] diq
I guess ... deep enough so animals don't accidentally dig it up?

[ if some thief tries to unearth it, he hardly thinks there's anything in the box worth of value that they'd be able to sell, but he's more worried about burrowing animals that could accidentally ruin it for them.

sylvain takes piece of branch and breaks it, sharpens the end with a dagger. this will be their marker. ]

gomen work killed me

Date: 2021-06-18 09:10 pm (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (Default)
From: [personal profile] diq
Um, alright ....

[ he doesn't really know what else to do, if there's some sort of ceremony involved with these things. but for what it's worth, he takes out his handkerchief and wraps the small box in it, and places it carefully in the hole that felix has dug.

he sits cross-legged on the dirt, and thinks about what to say. finally, he settles with, ]


I guess I'll go first.

To Miklan, whom I never got along with, you are always in my thoughts along with all of the regrets I've had since we were children.

.... to Ingrid, I wish you listened to me. [ a mirthless laugh. ] I guess it doesn't matter now. Whatever compelled you to stay, I ... I hope it made you happy in the end. Even if it's hard.

... Dimitri, you - [ his voice catches, and then he starts crying.

it's awful. he wasn't expecting it. it just wells up in him like a storm; first like lead, then bile at the back of his throat, the experience frustrating, and humiliating. ]
- you would've made a good king. And I still believe that. It didn't have to be like this, but -

[ but nothing. he had lost. they won. what other excuse does he have.

he didn't realize it was going to be this hard, and he doesn't finish his eulogies. sylvain wipes his face with the back of his hand and is quiet for a while as he whimpers like a child, because he doesn't know what else to say. ]

Re: no worries!

Date: 2021-06-20 12:05 am (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (Default)
From: [personal profile] diq
Felix ... Felix, I -

[ all of those words, from a man who never liked funerals nor talking, and sylvain feels like his mind is unspooling ever so slowly under grief.

even felix is affected, and how can he not be? this is the only way the two of them can say good bye now. there's something cowardly about it to him. but how else would they say such words to the people they care for? it's already too late now and it was still too late then when they were in battle and have seen each other with fear in their eyes as if meeting each other again for the first time, and it was too late to save anyone.

are they free? who knows what that means now. sometimes sylvain wishes he was with the knights of seiros, because at least, if they die, someone can sweetly lie to them that there was a version of peace they can believe in no matter how brutal the war is.

barring all of that, all they have is dirt and suffering. sylvain wipes his eyes with the back of his hand and grabs the shovel. if there's nothing else, he'll do the honours and bury the box. it's his turn now. his hands are shaking and he feels numb. this was a mistake, he thinks; and he was hoping, foolishly, that he'd feel lighter. better. guilt-free. but he doesn't, his heart is heavy and his head aches and he digs. ]

Date: 2021-06-20 08:05 pm (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (✦ ᴡʜᴀᴛᴇᴠᴇʀ.)
From: [personal profile] diq
I don't plan on coming back.

[ sylvain takes a piece of stick and buries it over as a makeshift marker. not that they intend to come back anymore; he doesn't intend to make this a habit.

it's embarrassing, to have been rendered so vulnerable in front of a grave that isn't even quite real. and he can't say that he's said everything he needs to, there's likely more that he would like. but that's enough of that. no need to become martyrs over their shared grief. ]


In any case, they're probably looking for us. We should return.

Date: 2021-06-24 02:49 pm (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (✦ sʜᴏᴄᴋ)
From: [personal profile] diq
... you mean long-term? Or just ... in general?

There's the war to think of, I still have a job to do.

[ whomever thought it was a good idea to put so much responsibility on him ought to be fired. it's probably hubert, and he won't ever tell that to his face, but the sentiment remains the same. ]

Date: 2021-06-29 12:51 am (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (Default)
From: [personal profile] diq
Leaving. [ sylvain repeats after him, feeling dumb as he says it, like he can't believe he's suggesting this to him now. after the war? just walking away from it all? ]

You can't be serious. What for? Where will you go?

Date: 2021-07-02 07:46 pm (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (✦ ʜᴀʜ!)
From: [personal profile] diq
... just like the professor before, I suppose.

Did you admire her that much?

[ which is understandable, he supposed, but he's also keeping the tone light because he knows felix is serious. he doesn't fit well in this structure, anyway - sylvain seeks order despite his personality, but felix has always felt like a lone wolf since he realized who he wanted to be, and growing up and working towards that kind of man.

it's admirable, in a way. sylvain would never do it. ]

Date: 2021-07-03 01:44 am (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (Default)
From: [personal profile] diq
It's not enough that we're following Edelgard? She suffocates me with how badly she wants change and victories to go along with that.

[ perhaps there are different kinds of victory here, with felix weighing one after the other and deciding which one to invest in like a judge. ]

You're going to make me worry like that.

Date: 2021-07-03 05:44 pm (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (✦ ᴀɴᴅ?)
From: [personal profile] diq
No, I meant it's worrisome in the sense that any news coming from you from far away is always going to be delayed. It's not like you're easy to get hold of.

[ nor is the continent small enough that such things were easy to maintain. he sighs. ]

Well, I won't stop you. But do keep in touch.

Date: 2021-07-08 12:05 am (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (✦ ʜᴀʜ!)
From: [personal profile] diq
Why not? Look, it's not a bad deal.

I'll be different from Miklan, or my father. I'll be better now.

But I can't just go around like a vagabond. At some point in my short life, I'd like to have a family too.

[ maybe. possibly. if his luck with women ever changes. ]

Date: 2021-07-10 12:24 am (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (Default)
From: [personal profile] diq
[ sylvain winces at those words. ] Come now. You know it's not like that, for me. And if Edelgard has her way it wouldn't even matter which one of my children will get the crest at all.

It's just something I've been thinking more and more of as this war goes on. I want a place to return to and become myself. And maybe not be so lonely.

If you're leaving, there's not much else I can be with who remembers what the past was like, before. I can't really call the Emperor a close friend. [ he makes it sound like a concession, he supposes, but sylvain is more earnest than that, which doesn't always come out honestly, but here it was. ] At some point the war will end. I'm just thinking of a future.

Date: 2021-07-11 09:20 pm (UTC)
diq: ( ɴᴜɢɴᴀᴄɪᴏᴜs ) (✦ ᴡʜᴀᴛᴇᴠᴇʀ.)
From: [personal profile] diq
Between the two of us, who are the only ones remaining from that past - somebody has to, other than Edelgard. We owe it to the dead.

[ that's what he believes, anyway. sylvain sighs when felix continues, and answers him with a tired voice - ]

... I know. You're stubborn that way.

But I'll have you know, my children will know you as "Uncle Felix" and I don't want disappointment in their future if you never come and visit at least once a month.

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Felix

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