IC: @victory_road Pokégear inbox

[bestswordmaster]

Sylvain said I needed to record something to tell you to leave a message, even though if you're bothering to message me in the first place you already know what you're supposed to do, so this is pointless. So...leave a message, I guess. Maybe I'll get back to you. Maybe I won't.

[beep]

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[bestswordmaster]

[Okay, so Felicity told him not to throw himself into physical activity to avoid feelings, and so he’s not doing that. But he is giving himself a birthday present, just for a little while, in going out to the pond to skate. Look, he’s not alone this time! He brought Inda, and he brought Brandl who wanted to learn how to skate, and in this world it turns out they do make skates for Pokémon so he bought her a pair.

But after an hour or two, Inda is insistent on going back inside. So he obliges her, quietly resigning himself to the fact that much like Sylvain, he’s probably never going to turn her down for anything she wants. Sigh.

Once there, he joins her on the bed and watches them both. He pats Inda’s leaves the way he’s seen Sylvain do.]

You know, Inda, there’s an old Faerghan story about a princess cursed to sleep a lot like this. She wakes up when her so-called ‘true love’ comes and kisses her. The whole thing is nonsense, but...what do you think, should I try it? Ha. You never know.

[When she starts rummaging through Sylvain’s things, he stays where he is on the bed and takes his fiancé’s hand just to hold it.]

Sylvain, she’s getting awfully bold. Soon she’s going to think she owns the place. And let’s face it, she’ll be right.

What are you looking for?

[gautsome]

[Sylvain, of course, doesn't stir. His breaths come as slow and deep as ever. His hand is lax in Felix's grip, though at least his skin is as warm as ever. Despite everything, he's still alive. Maybe only just, but alive nonetheless.

Inda continues her rustling until she finally comes out with a relatively small, blue gift bag. She hops back up onto the bed and sits on Sylvain's abdomen. The gift is set beside the men's intertwined hands, before she uses a single, stubby arm to nudge Felix's own hand toward it.

Content with these efforts, Inda lays out, head nestled above Sylvain's chest. Her eyelids droop but... she keeps them open and mostly focused on Felix for the time being.]

[bestswordmaster]

[As soon as Inda pulls the little bag out, Felix knows it for what it is. But he waits until she confirms it before using his free hand to open it and peer inside.

He hasn't given that much thought to his birthday; he hasn't been all that fond of it to begin with for a long time, and he'd thought this year might be different, but no--it's best that Felix didn't mention it to anyone or make any plans. It wouldn't feel right without Sylvain there. Best to let it pass quietly. Maybe Dimitri will forget.]

[gautsome]

[Sylvain, and now Inda by default, had no intentions of letting it pass quickly. And when Sylvain eventually wakes, there will be plenty of apologies and apology kisses to be had. For now, Felix will have to settle with the unspoken.

Immediately obvious is a letter, written in a delicate hand upon incredibly fancy looking stationary. Felix being Felix will know that it's Sylvain's writing, scrawled out in a rather verbose letter.]

Felix,

I won't lie, I have spent a fair bit of time agonizing over what I wanted to get you. I mean, what do you get a guy that has cats that literally make money for him? You could buy anything in this world at this point. Moreover, you have given me so much in the last few months, nothing could ever come close to those gifts. I know they have not been intended as anything more than kindnesses, but still... I think about all you have done for me, and I almost despair because I don't know how I will ever come close enough to conveying my gratitude.

But I figured I could start with this letter. It's hard for me to put into words, out loud at least, how much you truly mean to me. But writing... makes it a little easier. And if I write it out, you can always carry it with you. That way, while you are traveling, you have a reminder from me always.

Of course you could always call me and I could tell you that but. Not the point.

Right. Okay.

The truth is, Felix, I have never felt like I had much of a future. You know that -- we have talked about it back and forth so many times. That changed at the start of this year. Before that, really, but the night we spent together -- fully together -- cemented just how much better things were getting. Things don't look so dark and hopeless anymore. I have you, I have our friends, and I have the Pokemon we're raising together. This... is everything I could have wanted.

You showed me that love was not only possible, but that I was meant to experience it just as anyone else was. And you showed me that family isn't what blood runs in my veins, but the people who value me for me. You are my family, Felix. There are others, but I would not have them if not for you.

I used to face the day with a sense of fear and ambivalence. With nothing to look forward to, every day felt like a death march. Now, I wake up in the morning and know it will only be a few minutes until I get to see a smile on your face. Until we get to hold Inda together and watch her grow just a little more, each passing day. And even if we are not together throughout the day, I know that -- more often than not -- it will be you that I fall asleep beside every night.

You being in my life is the greatest thing that could have ever happened to me. Today is the best day of the year, simply because it is a marker of the fact that you are alive. You're alive, and out of everyone in the world, you chose me to spend your life with. If I had a choice, I would make this a holiday. I would ensure everyone knew what a brilliant, strong, and truly caring man you are.

I hope you won't mind if I settle for simply screaming it for everyone in the hotel to hear.

Okay, okay. Maybe not. But... Hopefully, if I had my way, you're probably reading this while I was still asleep. You're probably looking at me right now with a silly smile on your face, grateful that I'm not awake to see just how red the tips of your ears are. And I bet they'll get even redder when I tell you that I sprayed this with my cologne and kissed every inch of it. That's okay. I'll find another way to make you blush once you wake me up.

As for the rest of this little package... I tried to stick mostly to practical things in this gift. With all our traveling, it's hard for me to expect you to carry around trinkets and things. Some of what I got might push the boundary for what's considered "necessary" but... I think you will appreciate them all the same.

Thank you for everything, Felix.

With all the love in Fodlan, Kanto, and Johto,

Sylvain Fraldarius

[Beneath this, there are more goodies to be found. There are several discs in the bag as well -- a collection of TMs for battling purposes. There's two packages of vitamins as well, enough to raise the stats of a single pokemon twice over, or to be spread out.

But there's also some... less than useful stuff in there. There's a purple beret, one that looks suspiciously like the top of Inda's head. Tucked into it is a box of cologne -- Sylvain's cologne. There's a second note on here -- For when you miss me on the road..

Finally, there's a small piece of metal in the shape of a heart -- strung onto a very simple chain. It's a necklace, excessively simple at first. Yet up close, it would become evident that half of the heart his made up of Sylvain's thumbprint. The other is an imprint of Inda's little "hand." Etched into the back, once again in Sylvain's handwriting, is the following: To our favorite person - S & I.]

[bestswordmaster]

[Felix is a little surprised to see a letter in the first place, much less such a long one. There's no way Sylvain could have known ahead of time what would happen. But of course, Sylvain anticipated that surprise and explained it right away.

So he reads, and he reads, and when he gets to the end he goes back to the top and reads again.

It may have been intended for Felix to carry as a reminder while traveling, but it's serving perfectly well even now when he's not going anywhere at all. Hope for the future...will Sylvain still feel that way when he comes back? Or will he not even need hope anymore because he's seen the future already?

But if Felix could give him hope once, he can do it again. Seeing that this is all Sylvain ever wanted...it's almost enough to soothe the ache of having little purpose to his life beyond existing, here. He could live with it, he thinks, if his only purpose was to work to give Sylvain happiness.

The further he reads, the harder it gets to see the page properly--dammit. He wipes at his eyes with his sleeve, not wanting to risk tears dripping onto the paper and smudging the ink. For once, Felix thinks he'd give anything to let Sylvain see him cry this time and tease him about blushing over words that seem to fill him up and spill over like boiling water. But...

But he is smiling, for real, for the first time in days. And, despite knowing it's exactly what Sylvain would have wanted him to do, he does take the time to bring the paper to his nose and close his eyes to smell the cologne.

It's hard for Felix to truly comprehend what Sylvain's thanking him for. He knows because this letter explains it, but his heart still thinks it ought to be him thanking Sylvain instead. Felix has tried hard, but he knows that sometimes he says exactly the wrong thing, and sometimes he loses his patience at exactly the wrong time, and sometimes he doesn't show his love the way he should. But Sylvain has always been there anyway, even when Felix was at his absolute worst.

And... Sylvain Fraldarius. Even though he was the one to have it inscribed on the ring, Felix isn't expecting that here in the letter. After reading it twice all the way through, he sets it down and scrubs at his eyes; the tears keep falling mercilessly despite his best efforts, but they're not all sorrowful ones. He sniffles quietly and looks at Inda.]

I don't...think I've ever said so out loud, but. I love you, Inda. I'm no good at expressing it. Sorry about that.

[As much as it hurts to have to read this while Sylvain is gone, it also...helps. He doesn't feel quite as far away as he did just a few minutes ago. Once you wake me up, the letter says, and it sounds like a promise that he will wake.

So he sets the bag aside, too, for now. He gently cups Sylvain's cheek in his palm and leans down to kiss him--their Sleeping Beauty, ha. 'Aw, Fe, how sweet! I mean, I am the fairest one of all, so it's definitely accurate, but it's nice to hear you say it. ;)' That's a different story altogether, mind-Sylvain. But that's okay.

Felix pulls back and lies down, pillowing his head on Sylvain's shoulder and draping one arm around both his chest and Inda at once, and he lets himself cry for once. And some of these tears are sad, yes; but some of them are happy. Sylvain will be back, and no matter what he's gone through, he will always belong right here. Felix's fool.

...he'll look at the rest of the gifts when he can stop bawling like a child, he decides.]

[gautsome]

[Inda stares up at Felix for a long moment. No, Felix hadn't said it. But she hadn't either. And while her father may have been excessive in declaring his love for the people that mattered, it wasn't always so feasible. For her, actions spoke far louder than words. That meant making sure her Papa knew that he was loved, and not just by her.

Still, that doesn't mean she doesn't appreciate it. And she certainly appreciates being able to nestle between the two of them. It isn't quite right, Sylvain isn't chattering to himself, or humming a little tune or just being the noisy nuisance that she knew to be her parent, but it's still him. And it's still her Papa.

They're both warm and still here. That's how she knows it will be okay.]

[bestswordmaster]

[Felix sort of hates the fact that after he spends maybe twenty minutes getting salt water all over Sylvain's shirt, he actually does feel a little better. He sits up and takes a deep breath, wipes his face one last time, before he picks the little bag back up and pulls out the rest of what's inside.

His smile is softer than he'd allow in front of other people when he sees the assortment of disks--every one of them is something he's mentioned offhand or pondered aloud at some point while chatting with Sylvain about his battle strategies and where his team still has gaps. ...which means Sylvain remembered everything he said.

The hat confuses him until he pulls it all the way out and he can see its resemblance to Inda's leaves. His smile turns into a quiet snort seeing that and the cologne with its note. Sylvain is ridiculous. And Felix must be just as ridiculous, because he opens the box and then the bottle to spray just a little on the beret before putting it on.]

I feel absurd. I hope you appreciate what I'm doing putting my dignity through for you right now, Sylvain.

[Finally, he pulls out the final item in the bag. It takes him a minute to really understand what he's looking at, but once he does, he stares at it in something like awe. How did Sylvain even do this? He runs his thumb over the front, then turns it over and can't stop that stupid smile from coming back. He looks up at Inda.]

You're my favorite people, too. Thank you.